when ever i am motivated or ask for help i never succeed
what is wrong with me?
i find myself slipping deeper back into depression after such a long struggle with it
like trying is hurting me
that is the mindset im in nowdays
it is bad i know but i cannot escape it
also if i do not try i also get hurt
so everything i do seems to do harm so i wish i could do nothing
lol im like the psychologist who can never fix Himself
i move from times of clarity to times or confusion over what is unclear and why it is unclear
it all feeds itself
im really tired really fed up and i know not how to run away
ive given up my studies as from now
i feel it will only drag me furthur into doubt about my own abilities
sorry about whining alex but i guess ill always have it inside and noone can help me when it is there
im not helping myself by keeping it
i keep trying to tell myself im good and smart and creative and all sorts of on screen affirmations and audio subliminals
but at the end i deny if further
and all the while trying to realise there is nothing wrong with me lmao
should i try?
