I can answer the cupped hands part. Yes, all patting is with cupped hands.
I have never heard Master Lin say not to cup the chest, for women. In fact, I have seen other women do the cupping during group meditations.
My advice, is to cup gently where it hurts. Meaning, don't hurt yourself.
Hopefully some of the women practitioners will share they experiences.
Or Shawn will share some of the wisdom he has access to.
You are perfection.
Iam2 
