I'm glad you received what I pointed out in a good way. I can tell you get it, and, it 'is' hard to find to new language for things. I find this aspect to be part of our collective process of transformation. Finding new language for experience and teaching, along with being aware of the energy of the words.
It can be a process over time, and not an immediate resolution. Perhaps if you say you were 'diagnosed' with lupus, then, shift to referring to it as a blockage in your conversations, it just states a 'limited event' where that information was 'offered' to you by 'someone'. Your awareness underlies the whole conversation, so even if you use the word, it doesn't have the same charge to it, as accepting it, owning it, embodying it, or defining yourself that way. I had a teacher once who pointed out the energy in the words " I'm sorry", as a negative self defining expression. Now 'that', is a hard one to eliminate, if you agree with that perspective.
Saying, " When I grow weary or impatient during practice, I know I am thinking instead of experiencing the Harmony", shows real understanding of how thinking can color ones practice experience. I don't think we can just will ourselves into returning to the 'harmony' though. I find I have a natural cycle of immersion time into the exericise. When I am done, I'm done, and whatever that is, is okay. I may stay longer in the exercise or not.
Some random stuff:
- I think "awareness" is a better word than diligence. It's a softer word and very open. I do agree with what you are saying or pointing out. Also, I think that staying mindful is much more tiring work than active exercise, and I would take breaks, or days off from that, and, its okay to be human and not be perfect. There is something beautiful in that.
-Over time, you get stronger, and everything gets easier, less acute, less unnecessary detail.
- I don't see the whole food preferences, sensitivity's as being the same conversation. I don't equate wholeness to the ability to eat everything. It is certainly okay to discern what is good for you, or compliments your maintaining health or healing regarding foods. A completely healthy person has preferences regarding foods, or makes choices concerning diet for various reasons. I would also mention, that I personally know of two people who cleared themselves of life threatening blockages. They both changed their diets, along with qigong practice, yoga, or whatever, in a total lifestyle change/approach to self healing. As far as saying you are food sensative,
that carries a different charge than I have Lupus. There may be a better way to say it, and, don't get too fixated on this as to create tension, or over occupation with it. As Lao Tzu says, "avoid extremes",,,sharpen the edge too much and it dulls quickly! I feel I have an understanding of mindfulness, and, I am sure I've said things like, "I have a cold." when I had a cold. The idea of perfection and being human come up....balance...allowing some flow without too much tension inspecting and dicing everything up..
- Your practice, mindfulness, way you express yourself, is a practice in the present, and a way to go forward. Perhaps you have older relationships with people/friends that you can slowly bring up to speed(tranform) with your new language and alignments. Anything/anyone new that comes in your path will align easier with where you are at, and how you choose to define that. You may not even mention that diagnosis, if there is no need to go there, or introduce yourself with that piece, in more and more situations.
-I think a state of awareness, keeps you from being vulnerable, or losing sight of things. You may go to see your doctor and return to the whole Lupus conversation/diagnosis. If you stay aware during that, your awareness sort of filters that energy coming at you. You simply don't let it in, or embody it. You see it coming and choose not to accept it. You don't have to say anything openly. You are in power, and running your life. you accept what is helpful from the doctor, regarding medicines or whatever, and don't accept what is not helpful. Sometimes a simple tool like that mudra, or a talisman in the pocket, a rock, a string around your finger,,,whatever, can help you 'remember' who you are, or help you stay aware. As soon as you make the connection to the tool, you are in a more expanded state of awareness, if not before. Taking the edge off things is good. You don't have feel the need to 'protect' yourself. That is too stressful. You have power, you filter things, you stay aware. See the doctor receiving energy to help them help you, or just to help them. Heal and transform things. Retain your power, and help everything around you. Clear or charge your medicines. Make your own medicine everyday via yin/yang water. Your master's energy can help you with anything, and move you to go more and more to yourself, or inside, for guidance and help.
love,
gallen
