Sorry Oxygen,
The storms here in Australia have meant shutting down my computer for hours. There's one here right now and I'm pushing it. Just hoping lighting strike doesn't hit my computer. Really pushing it the computer is flickering with the lightning strikes.
Learning Strategies projects have also meant my time is directed to emails. Step dad going into chemo and hailstorm writing of my car. I was Lucky when it came to the house but have you ever tried to get someone to replace a windscreen during the holidays (Australian Summer) Two days before Christmas eve mother gave doggie his last bone and wasn't sure how to get food in the house for Christmas. My brother made a major detour so we didn't have to starve for a week. So enough about me. Just thought you might like to know why the long absence.
If you want to make permanent change you have to recognise habit need to change. It starts by thinking and noticing... That's where the feeling exercise comes in. Do it often if you're at a computer use a random timer to trigger reminders for yourself. Something like the motivaider is useful.
Also you need to go easy on yourself. Someone who changes their diet or give up smoking the neural connections that were the original behaviour don't get erased a new behaviour means you have choices and in the beginning the choices has to be made over and over to make it as automatic as the other habit was. That's where the 4 steps of the Natural Brilliance model come in. That model will even help someone with OCD because it changes the habit by first becoming aware of the 'what just happened here."
The idea is you don't berate yourself about it you acknowledge it. Appreciate yourself for the behaviour whether you like it or not it is serving a purpose that helps you handle life and keep you in the status quo.
I know we don't necessarily like the status quo but we fear any action we take will take us down not up.
So make haste slowly.
Use Natural Brilliance and set yourself on the path you want to go with a combination of Break the Habit and New Habit Generator. Release with the Feeling Exercise (or technique that work for you). Release on berating yourself, Notice... what happened, what caused you to take the old path, or what was your experience taking the new path. Respond. Decide and act on your decision. Witness. Is just being in the moment experiencing what is there, don't try to analyse at this point. Like a witness who reports to the police after an event. You are both a participant in the experience and an observer.
Alex
