For dealing with fear I recommend Anxiety Free and the New History Generator Paraliminals.
To overcome fear of talking practice asking help. You break the ice faster by saying something like I really like the music does this band/DJ play here often. Yhis may just get a yes or know response but you could lead it with an open ended question like would you be able to tell me their schelude or where else they play?
The thing is to keep the converstation to something that is happening right now. Like you did with the drinks. Asking where do you live, where are you from, where do you work or what kind of work do you do are all the wrong questions.
Are you from around here, what do you think is the most popular beer sold here, followed by what do you prefer and may I buy you one? These questions are safe topics.
If you turn it around and the girl asked the guy, What kind of car do you drive, where do you work what do you do for a living where do you live... the non conscious mind will send up warning flares as well. you'll think "gold digger where she might just be struggling to start a conversation too.
Use the Anxiety Free Paraliminal, look around your envirionment, notice and make conversation about that. So you'll be saying stuff I like this song, what do you think of it? You have a favourite that they play here?
Alex
