Proactive is something you do for yourself. Once you start including others and want them to do what you advise you move toward controlling. It's part of give and take in a relationship. Some times it's better to let others take control and just allow yourself to be told what to do, others you want to have an input make suggestions or even go it your own when others don't agree. Something we learned at the Natural Brilliance Retreat.
It doesn't make it wrong. Just look at what you're willing to give in the relationship.
Relationships and everything else in life is like a balancing act. You have to keep moving. Keep adjusting the sails. There isn't only one answer.
As suggested. Work with side B. What is missing, lacking or are you afraid of that makes you want to be so proactive in the relationship. Perhaps the discomfort comes from the fact that he doesn't always want to follow your lead? Don't worry about pinpointing the answer, it's never only one right answer. You can come up with a stack are right so leave it to your nonconscious mind if it doesn't broadcast one that resonates with you, right now. Listen to the Paraliminal with intention the outcome you desire in mind.
Answers may come or you might just find that the relationship has changed.
Alex
[This message has been edited by Alex K. Viefhaus (edited August 08, 2005).]
