Need some advices here.
I've been having a difficult time in getting rid of my "Unoworthiness". I've always been having the feeling of unworthy for some time.
This feeling has created lotsa unhappiness and lack of fulfillment in my life. I should say that it's also the same feeling as feeling unappreciated by others. Even though I realized that I've done and given enough (something, love...etc), I still feel the same way.
For example, I've always been feeling that I don't deserve to be in others' attention or appreciation. Another part of myself, in contrary, feel the opposite way and I keep telling myself that I'm special, worthy or better than any others. The thought of "I deserve something BIG" has always crossed my mind but at the same time the feeling of unworthiness still prevails. Can you understand the inner conflict?
I've been always thinking of getting myself a beatiful girlfriend. (I know I can create it) But meanwhile lotsa unresourceful thoughts and feeling keep emerging from my mind. E.g. I'm not good enough....I want to focus on my career.....I'm unworthy.....People won't be interested in me.....blah..blah...
Another part of myself always has the thoughts of ..."I'm a catch"...."I'm exceptional"...."I deserve a better girl"...