This is a little long – please bear with me.

One time in high school I came down with mono, pneumonia, strep throat, tonsillitis, severe congestion, and 104 degree fever all at the same time. I had to be hospitalized because the swelling of my throat was so bad that the doctors thought they might have had to perform a tracheotomy.

There was one person who stayed by my bedside the entire time I was there; she didn’t sleep, she didn’t complain, she didn’t leave the room for more than a couple minutes. My mom’s sole concern for four days was making sure I felt comfy.

My mom has been through a lot; she grew up in an area of a country where dead, decaying bodies were hardly uncommon, where her brother was hacked with a machete, and where her sister was kidnapped and executed because her husband wanted to “change wives”. Through all of this, my mother has kept her spirits strong and her head high; she has more resilience and patience than anyone I know.

Today was the first time I saw fear on her face. My brother and I picked her up from the hospital after what we thought would be an uneventful checkup. We had planned to surprise her by taking her to her favorite diner.

Instead, her eyes and face were red, burned by what seemed like a thousand tears. We stared at her, not knowing what to think; she said, “I want to go home.” As she said it, her voice cracked. More tears streamed down her face (as well as our own). Inner strength, life experience, and decades of patience could never prepare her for breast cancer.

We didn’t go to the diner.

Minutes after we were home, my mom tried to bounce back the only way she knew how – by explaining to her sons that there is always hope. She says if we’re strong, everything will be okay; we just have to pray.

I’m a skeptical person. I’m skeptical of religion, and I’m skeptical of atheism. I don’t know if there’s an afterlife, and I don’t know if there’s a benevolent, omnipotent being making sure we’re all okay.

All I know is that my mother is the last person who should suffer because of my lack of faith.

I tell you this because to me, this forum is a community. We have our differences, and we can't help but flame each other sometimes, but we're still a community of like-minded individuals.

All I ask is this: if you are a spiritual person, pray for my mom. If you're not, just wish her the best.

Thanks for everything.

-Ramon

RAMON,

I THANK YOU FOR SHARING THAT WITH EVERYONE. I NOW KNOW WHY I LOGGED ON WHEN I DID. IT SOUNDS LIKE MOM IS A WONDERFUL PERSON AND WE ARE PRAYING FOR HER AND YOUR FAMILY. I DO BELIEVE IN GOD, IN REDEMPTION, AND IN SALVATION THROUGH CHRIST. I HAVE A FRIEND OF A FRIEND WHO HAS BEEN ASKING SOME OF THE SAME QUESTIONS YOU HAVE. HE WAS THIRTY THREE THIS WEEK. HE IS A FANTASTIC WRITER, HUSBAND, FATHER AND IS NOW IN THE FINAL STAGES OF TERMINAL CANCER. IN THE PAST FEW WEEKS SEVERAL PEOPLE I KNOW HAVE BEEN DEEPLY AFFECTED BY THIS ILLNESS. A CO-WORKER OF MINE FOUND OUT FOUR WEEKS AGO THAT HIS TWELVE YEAR OLD SON HAS AN ADVANCED FORM OF THE DISEASE. SO THERE HAS BEEN LOTS OF PRAYING GOING ON AROUND HERE ALREADY. I CAN TELL YOU WHAT I KNOW, IT'S TRUE. GOD IS WHO HE IS AND I WILL PRAY THAT HE REVEALS HIMSELF TO YOU. VISIT THE SITE (WWW.DRO4LIFE.COM) THERE IS GREAT INFORMATION THERE. THE JOURNAL IS FANTASTIC AND THE WORDS ARE FULL OF HEALING. AND BY THE WAY, MY FRIEND WAS ALSO THE PASTOR OF HIS OWN CHURCH. THE PEACE WHICH SURPASSES ALL UNDERSTANDING BE WITH YOU.

PIERRE

Ramon, I am sorry to hear about your mother's illness. She sounds like a beautiful person, and I send my deepest wishes for her recovery. I would like to make a suggestion, and as with all suggestions, the choice is up to you. I believe that what is important is not what you have faith in, but just that you have faith. Just because you are not "praying" in the conventional sense, does not mean that you need to ask a more "spiritual person" to do it instead. Even the staunchest atheist can put a tremendous amount of faith in the resilience of humankind. So I encourage you to not get caught up in what you do or don't believe in, but to just believe.

Best wishes,
-Dylan

Ramon, I'm praying for your mom. Would you mind sharing her name with us?

Ramon, your mother has my wishes for health and happiness.

Your willing your energy to heal you mother will help, regardless of how you believe. You caring and giving makes a difference.

I don't know if you ever looked into the Spring Forest forum, but now might be a good time.

My best wishes for you both.

Iam2

Ramon:

My heartfelt wishes goes out to you and your mother. I too know how you feel. 8 months ago I lost my mother to pancreatic cancer for which there is no present cure. To see a fun, bubbly, extremely happy 220lbs woman in a matter of 6 months deteriorate down to 100lbs. To see the glow and happiness disappear from here eyes and face to be replaced with pain, and morphine induced complacency. She was my best friend, my sounding board. I love her dearly and miss her, but I'm happy for her because she is no longer in pain. She went home to her mother and father & other members of her family that completed their life's mission on this earth. "She is Home". I know that I will see her again when my life's mission has been completed and I will love the re-union. Is there an after-life? you bet there is. Ramon, think of a caterpillar that spins a cocoon about itself. The caterpillar as he know it has died. Days later, a winged creature of splendid beauty comes out of the cocoon ready to take flight. Metamorphous completed. The caterpillar has evolved to the next high level. Remember from physic, "matter can neither be created, nor destroyed, but can be changed from one form to another. When we pass on, we become like the caterpillar. Don't worry!!!! she will be fine.

Ramon--
Your mom sounds like she is a thoughtful and caring person. Yes, I will pray for her.
Take Care.

Ramon:

Don't be discouraged, man, and tell your mom not too either because this is a fallen world, an abnormal world where disease and sickness exists--God didn't do this to your mom.

I will pray to the personal-infinite God who is there expecting an answer.

I gave a prayer for your mother. I also wish for the best for both of you.

-youngprer

Dear Ramon,

I can feel the feelings of yours now. Please rest assured that your mum is in my prayers.

All the best,

Quang

Dear Ramon,

I hear your pain and I wish for you to know that I will pray for her. I've had experiences that resembles that of yours so I know very well what you are going through. The torrent of pain and madness within you must be an absolute nightmare. I will pray for your mother and that she may live for years more and not fall prey to breast cancer.

Best of regards
Kenji

Keep your spirit high, to keep hers high too, don't let her go down at any time, this beast can be defeated, others have done it before.

As Iam2 has said, it'd be now a good time to look at QiGong forum.

My best wishes.

One azn to another, you have my prayers.

DC21 - My mom's name is Alicia; thank you very much for including her in your prayers.

Thanks a lot everybody - I really appreciate it.

-Ramon