Forums IMPORTANT: PLEASE READ Jeddah Mali teachings Help

I have a problem. I am in a place in my life where I am alone in my physical world. I am so tired from my work and my children have lives of their own. I find that my only joy is listening to Jeddah and sitting in profound bliss. My problem is I do not desire anything but to sit here...forever. When I go out into the world my eyes are open to both the great beauty and the human suffering that is all around me. I see everyone else's stories and have no desire to be in one. I know the goal is integration of body, mind and spirit. I can do this on my job, but when I come home I lonely and tired. I am very stuck and sitting in my stuckness or sitting in my peace has not helped. I am afraid that I may be manifesting death.

Hi Sheryll!

When in meditation and connecting with the awareness that you truly are, you recognize that you are not alone in any sense. We are all part of one incredible energy that you acknowledge as “profound bliss.” You are far more tuned in than a lot of people on this planet.

However, you perceive an illusion of separation on the physical level. This is happening not only in your perception of your own place in the world, but as you buy into the illusions of everyone else’s stories. We are all so much more than the story that the identity and the ego protect so adamantly. You are developing the ability to look behind that veil and see the light, expansion and harmony that naturally reside there.

Jeddah’s teachings are not just about sitting in meditation and accessing awareness, but about taking your insights and wisdom out into the world. You are becoming a beacon that can illuminate the path of everyone with whom you come in contact. That is an incredible gift!

Please feel free to contact me directly if you need support as you continue to access and then share the beautiful, expansive energy that resides within you with a world that is in such great need of it.

Lots of love and a big hug to you,
Wendy

Hi Sheryll,

I am wondering where you are in Jeddah's teachings? I empathize with your feeling state, as I have experienced similar states like that (see my earlier post on depression). All due respect to Wendy and her offering in light of Jeddah's teachings, which are indeed expansive and healing and contain Truth, there is also the reality of dealing with our human condition & long established emotional patterns as we move through these sometimes radical shifts in consciousness. Believe me, I have been hitting wall after wall as I move through them!

I would encourage you to find at least one person that you can connect with that is walking a similar path and can provide support, and my experience is that later you will be able to support them when you are in a better place.

The good news is that you reached out for help, which would seem to indicate that you in fact do not want to manifest death, but you may be experiencing an "existential" death, as the way you knew things to be is changing radically, even if is doesnt look that way in the outside world. If you can stay moving with the meditations it will most likely shift for you.

The other possibility is to use the teachings to set an intention to create the reality you want. If you are lonely, set an intention to feel happy and fulfilled, or whatever comes to you as you sit with it.

I would also be happy to have an offline dialogue with you if you are interested.

Warm wishes,

WaterBird

Thanks SO MUCH for diving in, WaterBird!

One of the challenges with supporting people through email or on the forum is the inability to discern the nuances of what is being said and experienced. It is so much easier to help when you can connect with the energetic responses and hear what is not being said between the lines. I hope Sheryll will connect with you, because I am sure you will be an immense help.

Thank you so much for your loving support!
Wendy

Thank you so much Waterbird and Wendy,

I was in such a dark place when I wrote that. Spirit is very mysterious.

As it turns out my 85 year old mother passed away on 9/9/10. We were very connected both psychological and spiritual. It was not a sudden death, and I knew she was going downhill. In retrospect, it was like I was dying with her. I assigned myself her caregiver when I was five.

I felt a great burden lifted when she passed... and not just physical. It felt spiritual on some level.

Thank you so much for the offer Waterbird. I started Infinite Grace a few weeks ago and it is nice to know someone else understands. I will definately call on you if I get too close to that fine line again.

With many thanks,
Sheryll