Forums IMPORTANT: PLEASE READ Beyond Human Soulmate question

It implies that out of the billions of people on earth, there's only one that my soul is truly compatable with.

I see my soul as something that anyone would be lucky to be touched by.

[This message has been edited by Kaiden (edited January 05, 2006).]

There are so many wonderful people in the world, and so many ways to love others! Sometimes, you can even love someone, who also loves you, AND you can work well together...somtimes it does not work that way...

Why limit yourself with the idea that there could only be one? Not only does it set people up for failure (you and others), it also removes any sense of accountability, potential for self improvement, proactivity, and healthy surrender.

You have love in your life. Lots of it. Enjoy that, seek out others to love. Somtimes, it is romantic love, sometimes it is friendship, sometimes it is another of the infinite varieties of love---enjoy them all, you deserve it.

The difference is a Soul Mate is a soul that has agreed to incarnate with you and help you learn a life lesson such as being unconditionally loving, being more forgiving etc.

A Twin Soul often confused for Soul Mate is a soul that has the exact same frequency as you. Why that is is beyond the scope of this resply.

You only encounter your Twin Soul after significant spiritual growth, as a relationship with this person is VERY, VERY intense and not to be taken lightly.

Soul Mates help you grow and learn, whereas a Twin Soul relationship is orchestrated by God to bring more Light to Earth. A Twin Soul relationship has a bigger purpose.

You are usually physically attracted to a Soul Mate but not your Twin Soul (initially). This is in your best interest.

If you desire a love relationship (or anything else for that matter) it is best to work on your spiritual growth or consciousness. Meditate, work on becoming more loving and sharing.

A book that I would recommend for explaining why you don't get what you want (Law of Paradoxical Intent) is "Secrets of Attraction -The Universal Laws of Love, Sex and Romance" by Sandra Anne Taylor.

As long as you are focusing on being a channel for Light the perfect relationship for you at that given time will manifest in your experience. Be at peace if that person is a Soul Mate and not your Twin Soul. Everything happens in your absolute best interest. I promise.

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Originally posted by vita-man:
Why limit yourself with the idea that there could only be one? Not only does it set people up for failure (you and others), it also removes any sense of accountability, potential for self improvement, proactivity, and healthy surrender.

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Oh yeah, does it ever set you up for failure. Think about it, in all of existence there is ONE "special someone," and if you mess up with them, you've ruined your life. Who needs that kind of pressure? I'd hate to be anyone's "soul mate," because they'd be so afraid of loosing me that they would come across as needy. I'm not attracted to needy people, and neither are most women. Strong, independent people seek out relationships with others of their kind.

I also find it silly to think that God has a deep personal interest in who I have sex with. However, as a student of theology, I have a deep personal interest in who God has sex with. I guess it's hypocritical of me.

Then again, it's what made The Davinci Code so popular, isn't it?

[This message has been edited by Kaiden (edited January 05, 2006).]

Kaiden- not hypocritical at all- but really very funny!

Honest though, when I climbed back onto my chair and caught my breath again, I saw it as the kind of healthy paradox mentioned in Resiliency.

vitaman

I find God's intervention in my life very personal and very meaningful because it is very personal.

I find the idea of special people placed in my life delightful and intriguing.

I believe the soul doesn't rest until it rests in God. I believe that what God wants for me is better than anything I could possibly want for myself.

Listening for God's guidance in my life is extremely fulfilling and a journey I am totally committed to. That God has got my very best interests at heart is awesome. For me God's will for my life is not one that is life-restricting but fulfilling to the utmost.

Sex with a meta-level of spirit is the most awesome sex between two people, the passions are the hottest. When sex is divine it's exciting and fulfilling. To feel that you are partaking in one of God's gifts is absolutely soul enriching. God has plans for my fulfillment if I only choose to go by His excellent guidance.

I might also be hypocritical but I have a strong intention.

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Originally posted by Grant:
Kaiden

I find God's intervention in my life very personal and very meaningful because it is very personal.

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I guess that's the difference between me. I'm an entheist, but at heart it's little different than being a deist or atheist. I find my own intervention in my life to be the most meaningful, and of course the most personal. I realize I make my own choices, have my own successes or failures, and am guided by my experience and by my choices. Divinity rarely enters into the picture.

Somehow, the idea of God as a cocktail party host who taps me on the shoulder and says, "Kaiden, I have someone you just have to meet!" is a little far fetched.

By taking God out of the picture, the relationships I have aren't based on His criteria of success or failure, by rather by My criteria of learning and consistent improvement.

I've put God in the picture before, and the pictures are uglier that way. It makes every break-up a soul-crushing experience, because I've invested so much into one person. It's like investing an individual with the role of being God's Mission For Me On Earth. No woman can fit that role for me. Now, I'm only concerned with My Mission On Earth For Me, and because I'm the person who sets the parameters, I can adjust as I go along. Failure is setback and/or learning, rather than Exile from Relationship Eden.

One piece of advise most relationship Guru's will tell you is never to rely on another person to make you happy. I apply that to God as well.

I hope this has given you something to think about. I don't want to argue into the face of belief. My goal in life is to have a mind opened with wonder, rather than closed by belief. And because of this, I'll always wonder, and never believe, that I've found the "perfect" woman.

I have seen great self-sufficiency in you that I admire, I could do with just a little bit more self-sufficiency myself. I have learnt that self-sufficiency has its rightful place in the human mind and behaviour. It is impossible to live healthfully without a good helping of it. To wait for God's every instruction is evil and wrong and is not the way God intended.

I believe, to search for wisdom and then use that wisdom is the way God intended. I could do with a greater helping of self-sufficiency and I admire that in you, it is fantastic what you have, and it is something you should value. Those who are dependent on God to the extreme that they haven't got a healthy sense of self, that is an immaturity that keeps some people away from God. I believe God wants us to lean on Him until we can depend on our own minds to live well, but then that doesn't mean getting rid of God when He has made us more independent of Him. Steven Covey had a word "interdepence" - the fullness of one person interacting with the fullness of another. Paul Scheele has this described into the process on the Relationships paraliminal.

About the word "have" to do something for God. If you feel you "should" or "have" to do something, then the other person might resent it if you don't want to do it. I feel that good relationships aren't built around unhealthy obligation, and shoulding yourself with guilt. Too little wanting to do good, can lead to living a lie, shoulding yourself to do stuff you don't really want to do.

Loving a person only because you have to is not a real relationship. I am trying to use this principle to get dishonest goodness out of my life. To me a should can only go so deep into a person's mind, a relationship could turn really sour if it's all based on this outer layer. I find it very difficult to accept total unselfishness as a possibility for a person, although unselfishness is a virtue, the external shoulding is not the unselfishness that I think is right or truly virtuous. I believe the true virtuous unselfishness is the brain healthy "selfish unselfishness" - (thanks to Al Siebert for cementing that learning), when you really want to do something for somebody else because you want that person to be happy. I believe that it is unhealthy psychologically to be totally unselfish and a very dishonest way of relating. To love somebody because you choose is the only love there can be.

The method I used to come to know God more intimately is to pray mainly for what I personally want, besides I believe God does not answer dishonest requests. I believe that God uses this reflexively to encourage me to lift my values. By constantly doing this I believe that God shapes me to learn His will willingly. I just have to show a willingness.

About God choosing a soulmate for me, I believe that if I like somebody a lot, really a lot, and God confirms that He will bless the relationship richly and that He chose her AND I chose her, I am filled with great joy at this, and will be even more willing to put effort into the relationship, and I won't hold back from the relationship.

About the pain of break-up I trust if God wants a relationship for me, He will do his utmost to build the relationship Himself, and if there is a break-up I have God to depend on to catch me and heal me. Personally I don't think God likes the idea of break-ups and won't purposefully put me in a relationship to destroy me. When it's God I trust only good can come of it even if it's only a good learning curve it won't go to waste.

Regards
Steve

Your knowledge gives life!

Thanks!