Forums IMPORTANT: PLEASE READ PhotoReading, Memory Optimizer Need Help, or encouragement, or both PLZ

Ok, long story, and to those who will bear with me, big thanks in advance. I think it wise to start in the beginning... 'diagnosed' with ADD in 3rd grade.. 4th grade, difficulty learning division, excellent reader, interested in learning new things, read hundreds of books 4th and 5th grade on scientific stuff (electricity, black holes, everything). had trouble paying attention in class, found the work boring (yes, i really DO know how to read, yes i kno everyone else is still at the 2nd grade level, can i learn something new yet??) Got to Middle School 6-8th grade, became the "geek" and "nerd", got made fun of daily, ppl ****ed on shoes in bathroom (still digusting to remember), ect. quit learning new things because it is 'nerdy' still got made fun of. completely stopped paying attention in class, grades went straight to u kno where. Only reason i didn't flunk was because of high test grades. continued recieving taunts until 10th or 11th grade when ppl said, "OMG he must be a genius or something" i sez screw u all, i remember what u said b-4. Got a 31 on ACT test, graduated 23 in class :P with a 3.2 or something. Just arrived here at Oklahoma State Uni, 1st semester got a 0.66 (yes, u can get less than a 1.0 ) May lose scholarships (need a 3.7 to keep any) and possible academic suspension. STILL unable to do coursework, and not doing nearly as well on tests (last trig test got a 84, needed a 'A') Horrible procrastinator, just started up a written schedule (after walking into my 7:30am trig class to discover it was a test day, probably made a C on that test)I have the PR book and tapes a friend gave me, but havent got past dictionary test due to (you guessed it) procrastinating. I think i have a fear of doing coursework because every time i sit down to do it i get hungry (gained 30 lbs last semester!!!), get a headache, really tired, even sick to my stomach to the point of going to the restroom for 30 mins at a time. I come here because if i don't fix this REALLY REALLY FAST my college education will be offically over. Any help will be GREATLY appreciated!!!

also, my g-f was severly sexually abused up till age 15, and has been told all her life that she was way too stupid to amount to anything (even by her high school councilor, in those words!!!). Her foster parents do not like her, she has few to no friends, and i seem to be the only person who gives a crap about her. Any recommendations for how i can help her? I really care about her and want to see her through these hard times of her life so she WILL be something besides a submissive, abused wife like her own mother was. THX for any help.

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Originally posted by An0therN00b:
also, my g-f was severly sexually abused up till age 15, and has been told all her life that she was way too stupid to amount to anything (even by her high school councilor, in those words!!!). Her foster parents do not like her, she has few to no friends, and i seem to be the only person who gives a crap about her. Any recommendations for how i can help her? I really care about her and want to see her through these hard times of her life so she WILL be something besides a submissive, abused wife like her own mother was. THX for any help.

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All I can say is, don't ever let her believe that you are her only source of happiness.

True, don't rely on relationships to solve problems. Expect more problems to arise with more factors in life. But do what you can to comfort her.

History, yours written in excellence. To others whom are fools stands out this student who persistently reads books and understand new things. That should of never been quieted. I was nerdy kind of, I stopped like you. But I didn't "stop", I just didn't talk to people at all. I'm not that social, not that good with other people. That is a bad way to mask your identity... Or just not talk to the wrong group about your knowledge, hang out with people and stuff. Talk with geeks some other time. Forget your past of falling, I just recovered from that due to my 2 moves from NC->GA->TN in like 2years. Need anymore help just ask.

Thanks for the replys thus far. I realize now that I have potential, but getting it to resurface is very difficult. I think i posted that i actually get sick when attempting to study or do homework. Not fun at all. However, when i read something i am interested in, this forum foe example, i cant get away from it. If i could channel that effort into doing homework, i would be set for life... As for my g-f, I do everything i can to help her, but thus far with only some success. She does smile more often now, but her memories of her past sometimes rise up and haunt her. I'm running out of ideas on how to help her, she refuses professional help, becuase she can't talk about that kinda stuff with strangers. She told me things that she hasn't told anyone else, not even the case workers who took her from her parents when they finally found out about it. I have though about hypnosis, maybe i could learn how to hypnotize her and help her that way, but I want to be really sure I'm not doing more harm than good. Again, Thanks for the replys, i hope to see more. P.S. do you have a Yahoo SN youngpr'er? I am 19 and always looking for people to share my knowledge of various things i am intersted in with. (rcwarships, electronics stuff, anything computer, mechanics of engines especially the quasiturbine engine, and many other things to chat about) Mine is hightek_redneck02@yahoo.com , and i have Y!Messenger.

Sounds like PTSD. I worked with a research company back in 2001 to get venlafaxine FDA approved for treatment of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. The numbers came back in favor of Welbutrin, but I still have a lot of faith in effexor.

The reason the numbers came back is that effexor is a very mild dissociative. It puts you outside of yourself. At the same time, it bonds seritonin and dopamine, given an effect that is like MDMA until the body conditions to it. Trauma is something that happened, not something that is happening. No one is ****ing on your shoes right now. No one is raping your girlfriend. But, to deal with the fact that it has happened, it takes a distance between one's momentary essence and one's experience.

I would recommend PhotoReading "The Screwtape Letters" by C.S. Lewis, and activating fully the sections where Screwtape speaks to Wormwood about Time. Now, if I am a Satanist and I'm telling you to read the works of a respected Christian intellectual, there must be something heavy in there, and there is. When you are living in post-trauma, part of your being is still in the past. You're not flowing naturally through time, but instead anchoring yourself to an event in your history.

Since you've posted on the PhotoReading forum, I'm going to give you more encouragement than advice. Isaac Newton said that if he was able to see farther than his peers, it was because he stood on the shoulders of giants. You have the giants of psychology, psychiatry, religion, NLP, etc. available from your library for free, and available from bookstores at modest prices. (Previewing and PhotoReading a book at a bookstore is a good way to know if you'll gain anything from buying it). I'm confident that you can be the archetect of your life. You see, when you build barriers to keep out pain, then those walls are designed by those who hurt you the most.

You will probably not be able to "save" your girlfriend. I've played Messiah for no fewer than four sex-abuse victims. I'm not saying she can't be "saved," but if she can be, then she must be her own Messiah.

Good luck.

Try search NPL, sametimes you don´t need to say the content of the problem( most of the time).
That´s really good because it wont expose the person.
But you probaly will have same trouble with her cos she does´t want to go to the professinal.
you kwon what you could do ? You could go to a NPL professional and YOU learn how to help her( off course it isn´t the same of she going there but...)
Well see a NPL professional and ask its opinion.
Komplicado
Hope it helped

The only reason i posted in the photoreading forum is because i am just starting photoreading, and couldn't think of anywhere else to put it, so feel free to give me whatever advice you may have. While I greatly appreciate the advice given for my girlfriend, I'm still trying to figure out what to do about my own problems of getting sick when attempting to do my work. I have little time remaining to improve before it's too late to do any good (if it isn't already). I'll research this Neuro-Lingustic Programming (I assume that's what NLP is) and see what i can get from it. My photoreading development has been delayed due to procrastination and my lack of an ability to see the blip page (can see the X tho) and my severe inability to clear my mind. My 'mild ADD', if that is what it is, causes my head to be constantly flooded with thoughts and images, and refuses to be cleared, and sometimes hard to direct to the task(s) at hand. I am also not a believer in using medication to solve one's problems unless absolutely necesarry due to the major side effects most have in the long term (I still thank my parents for not putting me on ritalin, most people i kno who were on it just slept all day, or were in a daze, not really there, and many now have health problems) Sorry for the long posts and many thanks to all who reply. Still lookin for anyone to chat with 1 on 1, if anyone is interested. THX again all.

On your study problem. If there were great words of wisdom that could help you, you'd have heard them by now.

If you are looking for tools that would help you with your studies I suggest that the Anxiety Free paraliminal could help you get over your studying 'nerves'. Along with Memory Supercharger and Personal Genius.

Look at some form of mind quieting exercises to use prior to sitting down to study. Your getting sick, procastinating on studying (hiding in the bathroom 30 minutes at a time is a procastination trick with very real physical discomfort) words won't fix that. Action or technique is going to be required and something close to meditation can probably help.

Study groups. Study buddies and counsellors or mentors can help you with your study method. If you are in as big a mess as you say you are, get the college to help you. If they haven't got a counsellor to help you devise a study plan find a teacher or administrator to help you find someone who knows the system to help you devise one. Find someone you can go back to, to talk about your progress not just to write a plan and forget about you.

You have to do a bit of work on the mental side of things. Using the past to excuse your current grades doesn't help. Past, is Past, let it go. If anything, use what worked and forget the rest. You loved to read. Love it again. Where there is a will there is a way.

Alex

As always Alex, you wisdom prevails. Thanks all.