I really feel for you in this. I have a couple of compressed disks in my neck and when they act up, it greatly inhibits my life and movement.
I too have trouble with NSAIDs. Stomach kills. I have to do minimal Ibuprofen.
Like you though, I did all the research I could do; founds ways to exercised (this is SO important). But, the most important thing was trying to be patient and doing just a little improvement at a timed. I found a great doctor who had the very same thing I had (this was the universe helping me); and he made a really good suggestion that while I'm trying things and adding new activities to monitor the changes with a journal; so that I can look back on what works and what doesn't. This was a significant thing for me as I would go months feeling good and get another session (usually from overdoing pottery or exercise) and not know what caused it or helped.
Thanks for the encouraging words. I will look at that.
I rated myself high for Number 1 because I'm getting older and have not liked living here and have done so to raise kids and finish jobs. Now, that I am at a place to move, I'm older! Wow, funny how that works. Now, I'm less flexible and 'go-getter' and I'm now able to do this thing that requires MORE flexibility and 'go getting'.
I just need to keep my eye on the ball and do the steps. You are right, I need to get to the two places I am considering and re-look.
Looking back, I can see that there were more things going right with my relationship to begin with than not having fights. I allowed my dissatisfaction to cause me to become more negative. And my negativity caused me to become more dissatisfied...What a vicious circle! It was a real reminder of what I always told my kids. You can never control what others do. You can only control what you do.
I will continue to use this exercise to improve my satisfaction with my relationships with the people surrounding me. The exercise takes the emphasis off what is wrong and turns it around to a more positive what is right. And how can I do more of what what will work in a positive way.
I will also be using this exercise to improve my satisfaction with my home itself. We have the accumulation of 30 years of marriage and 3 kids. And I suspect a lot of the clutter is tied to emotional baggage. It is definitely not healthy for me. (The house doesn't need to be condemned. It's just that all this stuff around me causes stress.) This one is going to take a bit of soul searching. I'll let you know how it goes.
Hello all, I'm new to this forum, but thought this would be a great place for me to communicate with others that have read HFNR and are looking to keep up with the work beyond the book.
So here's my first lesson:
1. I'm constantly dissapointed in the housing market in Canada and cannot fathom how anyone could possibly afford a home for half a million dollars that isn't at least half a mansion in itself. My satisfaction rating on this is a 3.
2. I keep reminding myself that this is how the economy works, everyone (like me) is looking for more money and as employers pay more money the costs of running their business go up, it's kind of an unending cycle we need to make money to afford to buy something that is always jumping out of our maximum budget. I also remind myself that there isn't a price you can put on the safety of your own home, it's worth the cost.
3. The signs that would point out that my satisfaction has increased are: Feeling that I will have my own home. Finding my dream home and knowing that I can easily afford the mortgage payments. Feeling the relief of knowing that I too have finally got my own little peice of land on this earth, and that I have somewhere to start a family and keep them safe.
4. In light of what you’ve written above, what are the first small steps you could take in the next day to increase your satisfaction with this situation?
4. I suppose some of the steps I could take would be to start working on some exercises that will help me to feel worthy of owning my own home; I could start making a list of what I actually want in my dream home (number of rooms, bathrooms, flooring, number of floors, etc.), I could even start to pray for the help in finding my own home.
The more I think of it, there's a lot that I can do to start moving towards that dream that requires very little hard work on my part...I'm glad I spent the time to really think this one through.
First, let me say that I totally get what you are saying. Wow, the market today is really CRAZY! We are struggling with that on retired income. And, let me say, there is nothing wrong with wanting (more). It is the normal thing. I want to move and I want a new home somewhere else. But, the whole idea is to be Happy regardless of that. Finding happiness without those things......
But, having said that, I have a constant struggle with that. How do we do that? How do we get into the very NOW of living and enjoy that moment.
I'm currently watching Oprah's videocast book study of Echart Tolle's new book. He wrote "the power of now" . Which addresses this very thing. I'm really getting a great deal out of it. Trying to understand that in the end, we cannot 'take it with us' and so get to enjoying the very moment of life.
I haven't been keeping up with the Oprah online classes, but I've been listening to The Secret on audio book a lot. I find that I'm just drawn to anything positive right now and I'm working really hard to avoid or turn around any negative situations that I get stuck in.
I'm working on The Law of Attraction in small doses, it worked in such a way that I ended up with a free, autographed copy of HFNR because I was searching for more information and, wouldn't you know it, Marci made a stop in my city and was giving a few books away on the morning news that I just happen to watch every day.
My advice for getting happy is to surround yourself with things that make you happy. Such as:
- Turn off the news and turn on some music that just makes you feel like dancing.
- Only read the happy articles from the newspaper and skip the local drama.
- Definitely go for the $2 basket for your "victim" behaviour (complaining, blaming, feeling guilty), I've opted for paperclips since I've got loads of them at work and mostly it's just a visual on seeing how quickly they add up; you'll find that after one day your instances of victimizing yourself will drop dramatically.
- Practice giving thoughts of "lovingkindness" to those that often turn your mood ugly. I call it the Care Bear Stare because, in a sense, that's pretty well the idea behind it...sending beams of love from your heart to those that really need some love.
Those are just a few suggestions, honestly, we could probably start a whole new thread on the topic of ways to turn a negative mood around and giving each other tips and tricks to keeping a positive outlook on life.
No wonder you're happy in Calgary, these are great suggestions! I once spent some time in a sort of convent type of setting, and we were sheltered to a large degree from the kind of negativity that "regular" life normally dishes out. You would not believe how quickly the happy-o-meter goes up when you're listening to non-aggressive music (mostly classical for us, certainly no heavy metal and rap hadn't been invented yet) and you've turned off the teevee news. Since most of us can't live our lives that way, they also taught us HOW to do simple things like watching the news, reading the newspaper, and dealing with annoying things like traffic jams. And I do mean simple!
If you do watch the news, there's usually not going to be a warning that a negative story is coming up. Face it, most of it's going to be negative--news orgs thrive on blood, gore, angst and pain. Just pull yourself back from it, and see it for what it is. It's NOT "you" and usually not even related to you. Feeling pain because of that news is not going to help those who ARE involved. That said, a little prayer or sending healing is always a Good Thing.
USE delays of all sorts--traffic clogs are great for repeating mantras or affirmations--or eyes-open prayers. Grocery lines are great for reading a bit more of your favorite book--and if you're reading, you're not fuming over how slow the line is moving.
Don't take things personally. If someone bumps into you, assume it's an accident. Since that person is probably harried and stressed, flash them a big smile and take the tension down a notch or two.
In fact, SMILING does wonders not only for you, but everyone who sees it.
So that's some of what we were taught, and some of this Marci covers in her book. We were being taught that to bring us closer to Spirit, but it also brought a lot of joy.
Just a few thoughts--perhaps a bit off topic for here, so I apologize if that's the case.
Welcome HappyInCalgary. What some great suggestions. You must either be a child of the 80's or a parent of child of the 80's to remember the Care Bear Stare.
I, too, have become more aware of the negativity presented in all types of media, and have been changing some of the things I expose myself to. I haven't seen Oprah's videocast, but the book has caught my attention. I guess that means I should check it out. The expression "When the student is ready, the teacher will come" has been so true for me. And once I was presented with HFNR, it's been like falling dominoes (in a good way). I have been paying attention to the resources that have really spoken to me. And I have found that by doing this, when I need something, it has been waiting. I have been presented with a way to increase income. My bathroom scales have a post-it with my ideal weight right where the numbers read out and I actually got rid of my winter clothes in my old size (from The Secret). I knew that I really had never let go of my past and just built walls instead, and next in my pile of books to read is The Sedona Method. My reading list has increased exponentially, but my attention span and ability to concentrate has not. But, a couple days ago, I was introduced to some material on brain entrainment that I am checking out(think bio feedback). Also, I ran across the course for photo reading that I had set aside and forgotten about. I trust that I will now have the time to get through it all. One thing just seems to support the next. When I left my job, I knew it was time to go, but not for what. I am so excited that now I am moving forward again.
Great ideas for sending out the love. Here's one more. Give someone your place in line. It doesn't cost anything but a few minutes. And the payoff can be so much fun!