Quote from Kevin

"I made two choices that I really wanted… my second was to find a significant person that would be my soul mate. I thought for a while that a person whom I started out with would be the one. I used the program to develop the relationship and now it looks like I am losing. I did the program everyday and I prayed also. Can somebody offer me some advice? I fear my time is running short and I will never be able to have this."

Kevin

When I read your post what I can only describe as a feeling of desperation came over quite clearly. I wish I could help and maybe even wave the proverbial magic wand and give you the answers you are seeking but we know life doesn't always work that way.

I always thought CD'S such as Paraliminals and AFL where intended as aids to a desired outcome, not something that you should look upon as a guarantee of success for any given situation. I only say that because reading your post left me with the impression that you feel all you have got to do to keep the girl (or soul mate) is to listen to a cd. Listen, it isn't the cd's or the AFL course that is going to keep your soul mate hanging around, it's you that will do that.

So why don't you just ditch the program for the time being and start living instead. By that I mean use your own ability and talents to sustain the relationship, trust yourself rather than the cd's, or the paraliminals or books etc. You see sometimes I feel all this listening to cd's, paraliminals and programs like AFL is little more than vicarious living. And by that I mean we can get so preoccupied on the next course, or the next self-help book etc we can forget that there is a world out there waiting for us just to go out and start living in it.

I am not saying it is easy to do that because sometimes it can feel the hardest thing in the world to do, but sometimes it seems to me it is the only thing to do.

I have quoted John Lennon before when he suggested that "life is what happens to us when we are busy making other plans", while Alex himself made a suggestion to someone on this Forum that "15 minutes of silent self-reflection …. is probably better than total mind saturation. Less is sometimes more". Bang on in my opinion.

So, why not trust yourself and just stop reading about how to live and start doing it for real instead. Sure, it can take a lot of bravery to do that but the rewards are worth it. Likewise why not stop listening to the next cd telling you how to live an abundant life and begin living one now the best you can. The world is full of how to books etc and while you are reading or listening how to you are not doing it! Sometimes It seems to me that most successful people all these self help courses produce are the next generation of self help 'gurus'. For them, the self help industry certainly works!

Still I do not doubt self help courses have their merits when used correctly but just don't forget that real life is out there waiting for you to join in as soon as you feel ready.

Yes I know what I have said may sound callous and I can guarantee there will be lots of Forum readers out there hastily mailing in to tell me how wrong I am etc. But that is just the way it is.

Regards
Steve.