Thanks everyone for your insights on this issue..

I've been talking to a lot of my male friends recently and I gather that this may not be such a unique situation. A lot of people are in similar situation...

Grant, you are absolutely right... fear of rejection is common place, both men and women have it... especially when one's getting back in the circulation after a long pause... What do us men have to fear, especially when the intentions are noble and natural. With some good information on the subject, a little bit of work on the personality, self-esteem etc. and with support of helpful friends, it should not be too too tough, I guess )... I have started using some of your suggested techniques using some paraliminals, hypnotic sessions as well as EFT tools I have..... & I feel better already!!! ... good luck to you in yoru search too my friend... we're all in it together.... !!

Jeanne, thanks about your wise insights... the 'looking without looking' approach definately eases the anticipatory/performance anxiety.. which could a real killer...

Lord_Shandor, you're right on the money... unless the goal is clearly established, clearly and convincingly, its so easy to get lost in this game... being objective & honest with oneself as well as others is important... then only is one more likely to attract the 'right' person for the long run.....

Unis, I agree with you on the idea that its not wise to limit oneself by just focusing on 'physical attributes'... although the word 'attraction' to me means all three: physical, psychic(mental & emotional) and spiritual.... I won't deny it.. my male hormones do get excited as the sight of physically beautiful women, but if its just physical beauty that she has, then as soon as I regain my senses, the interest doesn't lasts too long (thank Goodness ))....

last but definately not the least, Alex... thanks for your insightful suggestions.. 'New history generator' is a great suggestion (along with other ones).... I knew/thought about the other ones...but not NHG.... but you are right... its' VERY important to work on/healing the past unresolved issues, otherwise I will just end up attracting someone who may have unresolved issues themselves ...

Thanks,
AeB