I have a problem that I am not even sure I can articulate clearly. Here goes an attempt:
I have learned some other qigong methods. I was recently certified as a teacher in one of them.
Before I had even begun that school and those qigong methods, I had been doing SFQ for about 9 months very regularly (at least an hour a day, but quite often 2-3 hours a day, usually active/sitting 50/50).
The only reason I began with this other school, was the teacher is the mother of my wife's acupuncturist and is a quite well known, famous and accomplished qigong teacher. And it turns out she lives about a mile from my house in this little cow town I live in!
She advised me that it would be better to stop practicing SFQ until I had learned the first form she taught for at least a year or about 300 hours of practice, whichever came first.
To make a long story shorter, if not short, I learned two other forms/methods of qigong (she is certified as a teacher in 10 and has trained teachers in about 7. Her credentials and history are quite beyond question) from her and was eventually certified as a teacher in one of them, the simplest of the three I learned.
However, I did begin practicing SFQ again after about 6 months of learning with her (it was about 300 hours of practice at that point, including practicing every day with her, which I have done for about a year).
But though I have learned all this wonderful theory, knowledge and even some valuable qigong experience, I have never liked this school or any of the three forms I learned as much as I liked SFQ.
Before learning SFQ, I had almost 30 years practice and learning with Tai Chi Chuan (including pushing hands, slow and fast forms, weapons, fighting and applications) and a lot of healing qigong. I had also taken private lessons from a qigong/Tai Chi teacher in SF, CA for two years.
But other than my first Tai Chi teacher back in the 80's in Los Angeles, I have never enjoyed or received so much benefit (and in such a flowing manner) as I have from SFQ and my limited long distance experience with Chunyi Lin.
I guess my main conflict is not so much the time I have put into this other school, nor the lineage, but rather, there are now students around here who I can practice with, as well as the teacher (with whom, despite my admiration, respect and gratitude for what I have learned from her, some personal reservations and/or uncomfortable karma).
With SFQ, although I am signed up to do the Triple Fortune seminar in Nov here in SF and I would love to attend one of the SFQ workshops either next time Chunyin Lin comes to California, I have no one to practice with. I have been very motivated in the past, but I find it gets harder for me without a group of people to sometimes practice with and/or a teacher. And that was the reason I began with this other teacher in the first place: it felt like a gift from the universe--and it was! No matter what else I do, I really did get a MUCH deeper understanding of qigong in general. And though I might not ever teach that first form I learned (I don't really like it that much, although it is relatively easy to learn and teach. And it does have some good qualities. But it is no where near as easy to learn or to teach as SFQ, at least for me), going through over 30 hours of training in it, including the advanced class and the teachers' certification training, really did deepen and broaden my understanding of qigong and gave me a lot of insight as to how it works and the similarities and differences between schools, exercises, teachers and approaches.
But I am still left with this very strong yin/yang imbalance: one school or method I like a lot, has so many ideal qualities that I admire and have practiced and received benefit, and another school of MANY methods, that is overwhelming to me, has some negative feelings attached to it now, I do not like as much as SFQ, but I have fellow students here and a teacher all local!
Maybe the answer is clearer, even as I write all this, yet I still feel a little lost (just completed a 16 hour Level One training yesterday in Soaring Crane Qigong the most subtle and complicated of the three forms I have learned).
I should add here a very important point (or collection of points) : I have ADD, am very busy with other career issues and family, and I have trouble staying motivated and focused anyway. The one great thing about this local teacher is it gave me a routine every day at 8AM to practice with my teacher (and I was usually the only one who showed up). I need to focus. But I am not sure what to focus on.
I guess another factor, is some of the Tai Chi forms I have lost by not practicing through the years. I miss them sometimes. I still can do and do dust off from time to time, the slow Yang School, Kai Ying Tung family long form, Fast form #1 and as short broad sword form. But I lost the double short stick form, Tai Chi (straight) sword, family fast form #2, the two person form, most of the push hand forms, and most of my advanced skills from lack of practice for almost 20 years.
I guess I feel that now that I have learned all these other qigong forms, most especially the beautiful, subtle and famously effective Soaring Crane, that I will regret not practicing these some day also.
Oh well.. I don't know if this post even made any sense or if there is anyone who can offer any suggestions or helpful comment, but I must admit it helped me to write it!
