Aha! So you
do want more than a yes or no.
No, it was before I got into all this self help nonsense. I was being an arse and I had a bust up with my best friend. I approached him a few months later and ate humble pie. I still feel embarrased about my foolishness even today, and this was 15 years ago, but it was my fault.
From a purely practical point of view then (seriously!) I wouldn't bother with the person. I could go into a long self-help spiel here, but I won't, except to say that you are only in control of what you can directly influence. If your happiness depends on someone else, which in this case it does, to some extent, then you're fighting a difficult battle. I honestly wouldn't bother. This person has said she doesn't want you in her life. Again, from a practical, perspective and if we were having afrank conversation over a couple of beers in a pub, I'd say 'Take a hint and move on'.
If you insist on trying still, then I would definitely get your hands on the Sedona Method book and work through it, because, if you don't mind my saying so, I feel the only way you're going to get a reconciliation you want is by working this through on the non-local plane. I'd also recommend Natural Brilliance for its power to collapse the 4 quadrants of a problem, and the 'Fresh Start' Paraliminal that I recently just acquired and really enjoy. OK, don't get all arsey on me for saying this, but you may also have an esteem issue. They are very common actually. For this I recommend Paul McKenna's 'Instant Confidence'.
Success in much of self-help ends up being a paradox.
I once had a friend who treated me really badly, and it hurt like hell. I mean utterly gutted here. If I am honest I think I had some romantic feelings towards her, but she really betrayed me in my eyes. I knew nothing romantic was on eth cards and the betrayal had nothing to do with that anyway. This was also before I became a self-help junkie. I took a day out of uni and took the metro to the last stop on the line, just to see where it would take me. I ended up at a weird round library with individual study rooms. I went into one of those rooms and just let myself agonise and agonise.and you know what? After a few hours, it all just subsided. The mist cleared, and I just wasn't bothered anymore. I was in a new country with a new start to that part of my life, and I had decided to enjoy my time with new friend and new things. I didn't realise it at the time, but what I had done was to go through a massive release. I was happy and I didn't care. I just accepted what was, as I know it now.
Guess what? It can't have been two days later this 'friend' was calling me up all smiles and how it was before - I kidd you not! She had an alterior motive, and wanted her emotional tampon back, and more the fool me, I didn't send her packing. I was more wary this time round, and we ended up not friend in the end, but that was for another reason and frankly, inevitable. But it's as I said - amazing things do happen when you release on them.
And by release and acceptance andnot caring I don't mean 'I don't care, she can get out of my life' because that's a cry for help and a denial because you want the opposite of that. What I mean is a feeling that you are as you are and that person can be as he or she is, and it's all perfectly OK, just as it is.
So there you go: practical = forget it and move on; weird and spiritual = send out love to that person and go for acceptance. What's it to be?
Stick around. This self-help stuff can be a lot of fun!
Peace, love, joy and a bloody big spliff!
IG
