Hi Bob,
I know how you feel.I have been a "seeker" all my life.I have felt like there is an answer to life and i have been seeking the answers for so long.I have spent thousands of dollars on self help material like you and im going to tell you about the only thing that has worked.It's called holosync.It is a meditaion cd that you listen to for an hour a day and it automatically puts you in a meditative state.It's wonderful! I have only been using it since December, and it takes about 3 years to go through the whole program, but it works!I am on my second level.This program helps you raise your threshold for what you can handle coming at you from the world and your enviroment.It makes you more peaceful,calm,happy and feel at peace with everything.I used to worry about money all the time and after my first week using holsync i noticed i was'nt worrying as bad.I feel a change in myself i have never experieced with anything else.You don't notce the changes all at once, but one day you'll wake up a few weeks later after starting holsync and realize you have changed.The changes are suble at first, but with continued use they get bigger and better.I love this program and honestly think it is a God send to people like me who felt hopeless.I was as bad as they come when i foud holsync and now i have hope again.I know holsync works.I wish it worked faster, but it takes time for true change to take hold.Check it out at www.centerpointe.com.

Also, Bill Harris, the founder of centerpointe is the most caring man i have ever dealt with.he helps you with anything you need and really cares about his cutomers.He even has a supoort line set up for holsync users incase they need to talk to a counselor or need help in any way.Holsync helps you release negative emotions and resistance happens sometimes.It's all worth it thogh.check out his website.Hope this helps.
Daphne