Dear one,
Alex is probably right but that's not really the point at the moment, is it? What's so difficult about having been abused is that no one can possibly ever really know, really get, what you've been through. And that seems sad, except that there's something beautiful in it, too. No one will ever be able to do what you can do; no one will ever know what you know. And that will help people in ways you haven't yet begun to imagine!
I too was taken aback by Alex's bluntness. Any sentence that begins with "You need to.." suddenly seems to spin me back to a place where I am feeling bossed around as opposed to encouraged. Much as I hate to hear it, I find myself saying it to others, too. The truth is that he was giving you sound advice, but that's hard to hear when it reminds you of some other place or person.
You have friends. You just don't quite know who they are yet. I want you to know that when I read your posting, I was very impressed and proud of you for making so many great efforts to uncover who you really are. You're doing great. Be patient and loving with yourself.
Badria
